Here are some tips to
take to heart before moving in with roommates.
1. Lay out the rules,
right from the start. Don’t wait until problems happen before addressing them –
make rules when you move in, or even earlier if possible, so everyone knows
what to expect and what the consequences are for breaking the rules. Some
issues you’ll want to set up rules for include:
Excessive noise
Late rent
How utilities are split
Having friends over
Cleaning up
Who gets to use the bathroom when
Borrowing stuff
Going into your roommate’s room without
permission
Which expenses to share (toilet paper, dish
soap, garbage bags, laundry detergent, etc.)
Then, write them down
as you’re going over the rules and make sure all roommates see what’s being
written. This way it’s clear you've all agreed and no one can make accusations
that the rules have changed along the way.
2. Have the downtime
talk. Tell your roommate about your lifestyle and what you like to do in your
spare time before you move in together. This applies whether you’re moving in
with a friend, significant other, or someone you haven’t met before. If you’re
a big drinker who loves having friends over to party and even spend the night,
but your roommate values his or her quiet time with a book or a movie, the
living situation could get complicated.
3. Fights are going to
happen. Deal with them. Don’t avoid problems because they’ll only get worse.
Talk to your roommate about what’s bugging you, rather than letting it fester.
It’s guaranteed that something you've repressed will come up again in the
future in a much bigger way. So when you do address what’s been ticking you
off, be upfront about it, but talk about it calmly to come up with a mutually
beneficial solution.
4. Bond a little.
Spend time with your roommate in the house or apartment, and out of it. This doesn't mean you have to be best buds, and in fact it can be better to spend
plenty of time apart since living together can get intense at times. But going
out for a drink or a coffee together and chatting about something other than
the dishes or the rent could be a big booster for your relationship with your
roommate.
5. Compromise on almost
everything. Having roommates means putting together people who might come from
totally different backgrounds. Your living situation isn't going to be exactly
your idea of perfect all the time, because everyone has their own idea of what
perfect is. So be flexible on most things – it will keep everyone happier. For
example, if your roommate is sleeping in but you’re an early riser, keep the
noise down in the morning. That said, there are some points that you should
stand firm on, such as illegal activities. If you don’t want your roommate
smoking pot in the house, that might be a point not to compromise on. And if
you’re not comfortable waking up to random people passed out on the couch, say
so.
6. Lock up for safety
and respect. When you go out, make sure all the doors and windows are locked.
This isn't just for the safety of your own belongings, you have a roommate who
cares about his or her stuff too. Besides, think about how furious you’d be if
your roommate didn't lock the door and your laptop went missing as a result.
It’s a treat-others-as-you-want-to-be-treated thing. Protect your stuff and
your roommates at the same time.
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